Time

What is it about pain and suffering that I dwell on so thoroughly? Now, more than ever, I’d rather find those few, or even that one, that makes the pain go away for a while. Their mere presence, or even just their voice, blocks out the pain of such a long pointless existence.

I went up to Canada last weekend and on the drive back I got to thinking

You see, the reason I went was as a spontaneous vacation to see a dear friend. I hadn’t been around in a while and I must say, Tho and Co. has never been stronger. And yet, despite living 1,200 miles away I’m still as much a part of the group as ever, if not more so than some of the old members who still live in that area. We even got one of the members to come out who has barely spoken to us in the last two years after he had a kid and ditched us for some rando girl.

What is it about me, about them, that keeps our bond alive and strong despite distance. We live very different lives with different drives and ambitions, yet we have only grown closer together over the last year. The ones who live near should be the ones most involved right? Or did they simply not choose to put in the time.

Life is long. It’s an endless agonizing journey of suffering that ends in a futile effort to stay alive long enough to sort out any loose ends we may have accrued over our lives. After we die we, along with everything we have built and done, are eventually forgotten. There is no escape from the inevitable demise of the things we build. Our eternal legacies are only eternal from a lifespan perspective. Do you remember the story of the McDonald brothers? Me neither. And their story wasn’t even that long ago despite how famous that name is.

The best we can do is to create bonds with the people. Take the time to know each other. Is it better to be remembered for accomplishments or feel the true love of bonds developed over time? The only people who say life is short are those about to die, because it’s so long that all you can see is an endless eternity before you until you realize that life isn’t infinite. Not infinite isn’t short, seeing life as eternal is a waste. That’s the difference.  To expand, seeing an eternity before me makes it easy for me to put off the things I value, the things I know I need to do because of the endless time I think I have. Next to that, 75 years is short.

In reality, life is long. So long it hurts. So painful that some of the most remembered people in history are those tortured individuals so broken by life that they wrote beauty and painful stories that resonate so well with all of us that they outlive their creators.

In the face of endless futility, what’s more necessary than a friend?

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